Power is nothing without control.

Uncontrolled actions, unbridled power will only bring about unintended destruction or consequences. Even in gym, workouts must be carried out in a controlled manner. There will be no swinging of weights, no jerking motions and no sudden, wild movements.

But, I, in my frivolous moods, often leave this cautionary note behind in the gym, even though it has caused me so much trouble. There are a few incidences which I can remember:

1. Spilling my glass of water over my keyboard, which caused me to remove every key to clean out the spill.

2. Overturning my 1.5L water bottle in my room, and soaking half of the accumulated newspapers on my floor.

3. Knocking into a guy in arts canteen and spilling coffee all over him. He was middle-aged, obnoxious and obviously from the law faculty, as he, after the expletives he uttered, asked if I wanted to be sued. It was then when my guilt flew out the window, and I was about to give him a few more reasons to sue me; reasons like: causing bodily harm, causing grievous bodily injuries and manslaughter.

But it was a recent incident that is a lot more serious. After closing my locker door, I turned, ready to head for the showers, and my hand kind of lightly slapped the outer (this is important, I emphasize the word: outer as opposed to inner) thigh of a naked guy besides me.

He stared at me.

I averted my eyes and muttered some apologies. At this point, it is inconvenient to look him in the eyes or for that matter, any other parts of his body when I apologize. I hurriedly headed for the showers and the incident ended there.

On retrospect, it is more dangerous to hit a guy's butt rather than their girlfriend's butt.

If you slap their girlfriend's butt, you are giving the guy a chance, a real life opportunity and avenue to exhibit his long repressed machismo; without which the only other opportunity in which he can impress his girl might be during the weekly Counter-Strike sessions with his mates which he had begged them to lose.

With such considerations in mind, he will probably secretly harbour gratitude, thus be more likely to be lenient in his encounter with you. It will be probably be a case of stern (of all the sternness he can muster, at this point, for personal safety, it is imperative not to smile or laugh) warning, or in extreme cases, a few punches and kicks. The blows will likely be pulled and damage be further reduced if you can put up Oscar winning performances of pains, grimaces, complete with realistic, stereo groans and moans. (Note: additional points will be awarded to those who can spit blood on demand)

But if you (assuming you are a guy) hit a guy on his naked butt, it would be a totally different scenario. It will be personal. It will be rough. It will be seen as a direct blow to their ego. (Note: I am not implying in any way that the ego resides in the gluteus maximus. Such a statement would cause Freud to leap from his grave; an event I am not too keen to initiate. The world had enough of him as it is)

It will result in severe repercussions.

Since the slap on the butt is considered a direct attack on his manhood, even though the manhood in front of the butt itself, it will not be taken likely. Be sure that pain and suffering will follow.

Results are not likely to differ even if the other guy smiles and winks at you.