"Do Us Proud"That was what my boss said to me weeks back, when he told me that I will be moving to another department. He said that my previous two bosses and my director has pushed hard for me to get this position, so I must not let them or the department down.
During a dinner on Monday, my director told me that my bosses (three of them including one who was here for less than half a year) had positive feedback about me and have been planning my career for the longest time. Throughout, I was unaware.
Planning for the longest time... I guess that is because I was too good to let go, but too caustic and abrasive to fit into a normal group.
Their plan somehow left out a significant pay increment.
My future boss (effective first next year) told me that the team is excited to have me on the team and are extremely curious as to who I am.
When I met my immediate superior (effective first next year) for the very first time, she told me that I am coming in with extremely high recommendations. She said that my boss is expecting me to contribute in many areas, areas she believed to be my competency, areas which I myself, am unaware that I am competent in.
People have been telling me that I should take things easy and give myself time to learn, but they are not aware of anything that I have just mentioned. They are not aware that this new job is not a new beginning. It is another stage where I am expected to deliver the results that I have been delivering for the past two years, results which I sacrificed so much, perhaps too much for.
Is it time to create the future again? Is it time to grow into their expectations again?
I do not know. I grew up with a thousand expectations of me and I grew with every one of them.
And I am tired....
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.But I have promises to keep,And miles to go before I sleep,And miles to go before I sleep.
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