"When you are young, you do not realize, but as you get older, you find it harder and harder to keep your promises."

I have been warned.

Human beings may be the only creatures on this earth that can be truly of time, therefore may be the only animals capable of understanding the abstract concepts of past, present and the future.

Thus, it follows that only human beings finds meaning in making promises, keeping promises and breaking them. It is not a habit that I hold people to their promises, it is natural for me to remember them, but unnatural to expect them to live up to their words.

Maybe I have learnt to view others as events.

You may find it dehumanizing. But death is an event, living is a process, the past is history, the future has yet to happen, and your stumbling into my life is an accident.

Life, yours or mine, is a series of events. And...

My promise to you is... an event in the Will Be.

My promise to you is... a bookmark placed in the later pages of your tome.

My promise to you is... a hurled pebble to create a ripple upstream in the river of time.

My promise to you is... an attempt to give you an insignificant sense of predictability in Change.

My promise to you is... a post dated cheque for all that you have done for me.

My promise to you is... a credit note from a stranger to a stranger.

My promise to you is... my futile attempt at clinging on to the past.

My promise to you is... a reminder for me to look back.

My promise to you is... a hope that the fulfilment can invoke memories to bring a shred of warmth to my tired eyes.

My promise to you is... never about you.

My promise to you is... always about me.

My promise to you is... simply a promise to myself about you.

 
It was at Singapore IT EXhibition 2003 when I finally made contact with the Panasonic X70.

Bluetooth
65K colours
Camera with Flash
Featherweight
Infra Red
GPRS enabled
Tri band

Holding tomorrow in your hands is indescribable.

 
Hits and Misses

My friend messaged me: Hey... what is so good about basketball?

I replied: Everything. It is better than sex.

She did not replied to that message.... I suppose I lost the chance to shag her.

Oh well... I still got my ball.

 
The Celebration of Bastardhood

With reference to a recent post by a friend on his blog, it said that a friend of ours has finally taken a step towards bastardhood. From a person without character, without attitude, without assertiveness, he has turned into...

Well...

I am not sure what he turned into, if he can turned into anything at all. If there is no attitude, no position, no assertion, no character, no aggression, no drive... whatever is left is...

Let us just say that is not much to work on.

I mean, you have to have raw materials to turn into something, right? There are few flaws, but few strengths as well. It is hard to pin any descriptions or names on him so hard that sometimes, even gender stereotypes fail to apply. So for the purpose of this discussion, we will call him nameless.

On the blog post, it is said that nameless has taken a step towards bastardhood. A step cannot be said to be an improvement, he is getting somewhere; but where, I do not know. And probably neither does he.

If bastardhood is a step towards assertiveness and building an identity or character, perhaps it would be an interesting phenomenon. But as with all moulding of gello and playdoh into any semblance of objects, it will be messy.

In steady and skillful hands, playdoh can be a figurine or an animal, or anything you want. In the hands of the inept, a crescent moon will look like.... something obscene.

In any case, nameless was encouraged to drop his gentlemanliness and decency to be a bastard, both of which I feel, are not mutually exclusive with bastardhood.

After all, we can be gentlemanly, decent and be still a bastard.

As they unleash nameless on the world, let us remember the lesson learnt when Stone Cold Steve Austin released Kane back into the world.

This time, there may be no Undertaker to save their asses.

 
To you, I am:
- destiny
- a coincidence
- luck
- an accident
- a misfortune
- retribution
- a quirk
- a force of nature
- an illusion
- a stranger
- karma
- a shadow
- fate
- a probability
- an anormaly
- change

To you, I am an event.

To you, I am the wind.

To me, I am neither:
- a smile
- a grimace
- a grin
- a frown

To me, I am simply the expression between expressions.

 
My friend asked, "Do you want to be Jesus Christ?"

And I shook my head and thought to myself, "He had the easy way out, all He was required to do was to die. I am required to stay alive and live the consequences."

 
I cannot bring myself to blame anyone who seeks their own happiness. I cannot bring myself to blame someone who wants a better life. I cannot bring myself to blame people for making mistakes in a moment of folly. I cannot bring myself to blame someone who made the same mistake twice in moments of folly. I cannot bring myself to blame someone for believing that they deserve to get back what they have lost.

I cannot bring myself to blame people for a lot of things. I sincerely believe that people have the right to pursue their own happiness. And there is little in terms of right and wrong in wanting a better life. And one cannot be faulted if one wants to improve his lot.

But in doing so, please leave me alone. I am in no position to give or promise anyone a better life. Happiness comes only with courage and prudence. But it can only be captured by contentment.

And none of that, I can give you.

 
Dear Santa,

All I want for Christmas is... a pair of boots re-defines luxury and indulgence. It should set new standards for the word overkill. The boots should have the following features:

Waterproof
Insulated
Slip Resistant
Electrical Hazard Resistant
Puncture Resistant
Steel Toe
Metatarsal Guard
Static Dissipative


Such perfect equipment does exist and Santa, you should get a pair too.

 
I have a strong hunch that few of us are made for the life that we are given. Everytime we are settled into a state of comfort, we found ourselves thrown into alien and often difficult circumstances which none of our prior presumptions hold. Despite the popular beliefs that human suffering is due to the infinite human desires, much of it is due to the infinite challenges and expectations that present themselves ever so often.

Just when we are getting used to being a child, just when we thought that we are getting so good at being one, we are no longer. We are suddenly teenagers, expected to be one without being told how. Our past behaviours are deemed shameful by new standards imposed set when the clocked struck twelve last night. The apple of the eye, the fairytale princess and the prince charming all suffered an unfortunate fall from grace. Alas, how fickle the human heart... the only thing worth capturing and living for continues to evade us.

How so many would love to remain a child, to remained loved, pampered and nurtured!

Years ago, I had the power to make the very life of the person who betrayed me a living hell. I did not. Half a year ago, it fell on my shoulders to save the job of a guy whom I met but once. I spent two sleepless nights trying to balance his livelihood against the jobs of many others which might be jeopardized should I help. And just when I am learning how to be a son, after spending years learning to be a friend, I have been called to save a friend from bankruptcy.

So I am often caught in the position to save people, so what? I did not ask for this power; I do not want to be anybody's saviour; and I do not want to make these difficult decisions.

Give this fate to someone who crave for it. I do not want it.

What I really want, is a little peace, a little space, a little time and a little extra cash to read my books, write my prose and paint my canvas. All I ask for, is to be left alone. I tire of being responsible, for the things I did and I did not; for myself; for others.

Just leave me alone, please...

"C*** P****, if we pull through this time, you will have to control me, because I cannot control myself."

As it is, my life is out of my own control, what would I want to control anyone else for? What good is a life that cannot control itself be to me? What would I want someone else's life for?

I cannot see past the next hour. And I am asked to bear a $60,000 debt that is not mine for at least half a year (in favourable circumstances) and what seems to be a lifetime, if things do not turn out as expected.

Should I seek the counsel of the fortune teller? Some versions of history had it that Sun Ce had a prominent msytic put to death because he was unable to summon the rain as promised. I hate fate and I plan to slay my very own...

I do not want to start with her.

 
Something troubling happened last night.

I cut short my dinner with Ling and my parents last night and rushed to meet a friend of mine after receiving 2 SMSes. He told me that he is in deep shit and asked me to meet him in Takashimaya.

I came to a dejected looking him, with a file at his side and a calculator on his table. There was a weak smile and a confession that he lost the money that was meant to buy products for the customers in stocks. He asked me if I had guessed it.

I did.

Half of the total amount was lost, which is close to $60,000. I expected a loss, but not the extent of damage. And I asked if my share of profit, about $17,000, could help.

"There is nothing left, C*** P****, there is nothing left, I used up all of it."

I was calm. Money, was never that important to me, and I hope will never be. And if I lost much, he lost more. I did not blame him, raise my voice or scold him. All that seemed so futile.

Anger was too strong an emotion for me. Disappointment sets in later.

All I felt then was a need to solve this problem of ours. I just felt that I am in it with him, even though the mistake was his. From a business perspective, I am confident that I can come out on my own and do a better job. But I am not sure if my conscience will allow that.

I do not think so.

He told me that, if we survive this, to control him, because he cannot control himself. He is always chasing that quick buck and taking a gamble. I suppose he lost big, bigger than the $40,000 loss a few years back. This business venture was to help him repay his debts.

And I thought he would have learnt his lesson.

Over lunch a couple of hours ago, he said that the total in loss is $80,000, but only $60,000 is required to repay the customer. And asked if I can help. I can, but everyone I know asked me to steer clear of him. My parents do not know about this, it is best that they do not.

He posed a rather strange question to me though. He had many times before, asked me to meet his fortune teller who was extremely accurate. The fortune teller was supposed to be rather famous, so much so that that appointments have to be made just to see her. But I have rejected him every time. He asked me why I refused, and whether I am curious.

Frankly, I am not sure why. I am curious, extremely so. But I can remember my late grandmother telling me that my grandfather, whom I have never met, believed that only those down on luck wanted to know their fortunes.

I suppose in this case, it is all the more true.

But I fear knowing my future more. It is easier to live day by day rather than to see so far ahead. As it is, I am already extremely pessimistic regarding the future. I simply told him that I need not know, because I am contented. And he agreed. Temptations cannot shake those who are grateful. Contentment and gratitude are things he had to learn.

Experience is a good teacher, but its lessons are expensive.

It matters little who did wrong, or what he did, but rather what is to be done. In fact, we spent a large amount of time looking at each other in silence. Reality leaves so little for imagination. The corner leaves so little room for thought. He has decided his past, but his future is as open as mine. And my future will be decided by how far I am willing to go for him.

I have my duties, my obligations. Just how far can I go...

 
The government has plans for each and every piece of land in this country. But for its people, they have been less attentive. Unlike the land, most of us have no clue as to where we fit in. Being free means that you have to decide what you want to do, even though you have nothing to do.

The field from which I watched the lunar eclipse is no longer; having replaced by new condominiums separated from the world by walls and gates. This country is always in the state of metamorphosis. Travel across half its breadth and lose count of the number construction projects in progress. Nothing is as we remembered anymore.

It did not seem too long ago when I was there watching the lunar eclipse, lying alone in that expansive field; thinking things that are no longer relevant. She is back on a more permanent basis and it seemed like yesterday when we used to talk every night and every day, of everything that mattered and everything that did not.

But it has been 3 Melbourne winters since we were last so carefree with each other. And it has been 3 Melbourne summers of silence. Nothing is as we remembered anymore.

Yet everything feels still so familiar.

Three years of silence and of absence… the mind should have filled it up with angry words and adjectives; reality should have filled it up with facts and happenings. But nothing… my initial search turned out blank.

But there should be and there were words, phrases, adjectives, facts, acts and happenings. I have graduated, found a job, passed my graduate diploma course, changed my job, and done so much more, so much more… Wars have been fought, innocents died, and the world has been made to swallow a load of propagandistic crap…

Yet none of it was registered in my cursory introspective search.

So through the method of elimination, am I to derive what really matters? And what truly mattered is what happened between us?

Billie Myers still sounds as world weary as three years before when her words sounded so true and appropriate, and Tracy Chapman has not lost that sorrow in her voice. Some things did happen and some things did not; regardless if I remember.

But everything still feels so… indescribable. Memories are indescribable. The heat is no longer searing, and the cold not biting. Yet there is that ever so familiar tingling on the skin to remind us of the warmth of a hug and the cold of early winter.

It just felt like bells ringing drawn by heartstrings extending back through time.

Things did change. I did not have skip through the past three years as I did through the first twenty three. Life is a lot more self-directed now. One cannot be burdened by the weight of the past if one is to fly. In my pursuit to overcome myself, these memories assumed a different purpose.

The past is but a reference point, not the destination. I do not harbour any hopes that things can be back to what they were. Neither do I desire them to be.

Things are not as we remembered. They need not be... but at least they are fine now.

Welcome back, dear friend.

 

you're fuck.


What swear word are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

 
Friday night: Gym.

Saturday morning: Basketball

Saturday afternoon: Badminton

Saturday night: Leg cramp during dinner

Sunday morning: Basketball

Sunday afternoon: Abdominal cramp when I sneezed.

They said exercise is good for the body, but I think I might be pushing things a little too far.

 
Matrix: Revolutions

Hollywood did it again. It has turned a perfectly wonderful story into a total disaster.

Matrix was at its best, barely acceptable.

Matrix: Reloaded was full of pseudo-intellectual statments that made little sense.

Matrix: Revolutions was a patchwork of half-hearted attempts at being philosophical and glaringly obvious stereotypes.

Matrix was doomed to failure from the beginning, having to develop a plot similar to its prodigious precedents: Dark City and The Truman Show. It is true that the Matrix has wonderful graphics on its side, but it does little to cover its inflated, hollowed out core. The presentation of it was hardly palatable, let alone gripping. If it meant to question the nature of reality, phenomenologically or socially, then it failed to tastefully address the most basic of the issues. If it meant to query the nature of human identity or the relationship between the self and the world, then it again failed again to ask the critical questions. With respects to the depth of the movie, it did not even come close to Dark City and The Truman Show.

Matrix: Reloaded has the best graphics of the three but the worse plot presentation and development. The curse of stereotyping was never more apparent than with the appearance of The Architect (aka. Colonel Sanders). It was a sudden end to the what was fast paced action; and also the end of the audience's patience. Momentum stopped short and never went again.

Matrix: Revolutions turned out to be a more entertaining movie experience for my mates and I. We could not helped but laugh at the failed attempt for the show to be serious. More stereotyping followed. The point of asking Indians to talk about Karma (the law of cause and effect) was to get foreigners to introduce foreign concepts to the viewers. It was to create a sense of wonder and play on their obsession with asian exoticism.

The same thing, in plain, simple English is called causality (which is a technical term, philosophically). But to call it so, would allow everyone to understand it, would it not? And then movie would seemed really, really shallow...

There is really no good need for using an Indian, after all if Schopenhauer translated Indian philosophical works over a century ago, an Englishman or French can play the part and still look natural. The only problem is that it would have made the white audience felt really stupid.

In a strict sense, causality has been shown to be problematic by Hume since over a century ago, something which Buddhism did, only thousands of years earlier. Thus, Buddhism does not truly advocate cause and effect, contrary to popular beliefs. For further reference, please refer to Verses From The Centre by Stephen Bachelor.

All the flaws, topped with a record long Trinity death scene was enough to have most of my mates asking for mercy.

I suppose what I really wanted to see was really difficult. I was hoping to see Neo and Smith tumbling around, slugging it out on the grass plains, with the warm morning sun rising and Bambi and Thumper skipping about happily. After all, there really is no need to waste all that water on making the rain....

Stereotypes, cliches and non-original plot marked the trilogy as a failure.

 
I was at the gym when I ran into a guy whom I have always exchanged greetings with, yet never got to speak to at lengths. He is an extremely friendly man, and he had, in the past, gave me a few training tips.

Last night, unlike the usual, I was alone. So we had a chat. It was more like series of quick questions about my training schedule and my diet. We planned to maybe train together, as I figured that I need help on the heavier weights. Conversation took on more of a casual nature, and he asked if I swim or my preferences for beer, red wine or white wine. He told me that I am welcomed to drop by his place if I ever felt like having a swim or wine.

My friend asked me if he is gay.

There are two possibilities: One, he is gay; the other, he is not. And I have quite a knack for attracting all the weird people. Both possibilities being very real, it does not equate that they being gay will bring harm to me, or that they being straight will not. Often, our fears are series of loosely, irrational associations.

Is it right to cast suspicion over the goodwill of others? Should we live in fear? Do we want to?

Weeks ago, my ex-girlfriend and I were waiting for our buses at Bishan bus interchange. After minutes of waiting, I noticed on the signboard that the last bus for me had already left. A young girl about the age of fifteen, oblivious to the fact, was the only other figure behind me in the queue.

I approached her to tell her that the bus had left, she looked a little shocked. Teenagers her age, have limited income and paying for the cab fare home might be a little heavy for her. She lives at Serangoon Central which is technically within walking distance. The journey would be about 5km; roughly the usual distance for my past jogs. A brisk walk will only take her about 40 minutes or so. However, I offered to send her home on cab, the condition being that I have to wait for my ex-girlfriend to board her bus first.

To show that I meant her no harm, I proposed that she take the front seat. After being given the directions, the cab driver asked me why we are not sitting together. I told him that I do not know her.

I still do not know her name, and I do not need to.

I wanted to drop her off near my place and ask her to walk home, which is only 2 stops away, but she complained that it was too far away.

Kids nowadays…

In any case, would it not be sad if none of us trust each other? Some say that trust is earned. But I trust because…

”Because I choose to.”
Keanu Reeves as Neo
Matrix Revolutions

I quote the Matrix Revolutions because it is appropriate for this situation, not because I like it. In fact, I hate it.

 
It came as a surprise when I came across an article on how universities in the states refuse to hire their own graduates; a phenomenon I thought was exclusive to Singapore.

It is well known that there is a class distinction between universities in the states, but it seems that less than 2% of the universities hire their own graduates. In Singapore, the unspoken assumption was that intellectual inbreeding will bring about an entire campus of idiots.

Their belief is totally unfounded.

For as far as many are concerned, the campus are crawling with idiots as it is.

We got to be realistic. The output depends heavily on the input. No one has and probably no one will ever think of NUS, NTU or SMU as a value-added institutions. But I will keep my disparaging remarks on the education system to myself for the time being.

I quote the blog entry:

Schools on the lower end of the prestige scale seem to abhor their own graduates, which says a lot about what they think of their own training programs.

Universities should not be ashamed of their training or their own graduates. If you can't drink the water your own well pumps out, why serve it to your neighbors?

 
Power is nothing without control.

Uncontrolled actions, unbridled power will only bring about unintended destruction or consequences. Even in gym, workouts must be carried out in a controlled manner. There will be no swinging of weights, no jerking motions and no sudden, wild movements.

But, I, in my frivolous moods, often leave this cautionary note behind in the gym, even though it has caused me so much trouble. There are a few incidences which I can remember:

1. Spilling my glass of water over my keyboard, which caused me to remove every key to clean out the spill.

2. Overturning my 1.5L water bottle in my room, and soaking half of the accumulated newspapers on my floor.

3. Knocking into a guy in arts canteen and spilling coffee all over him. He was middle-aged, obnoxious and obviously from the law faculty, as he, after the expletives he uttered, asked if I wanted to be sued. It was then when my guilt flew out the window, and I was about to give him a few more reasons to sue me; reasons like: causing bodily harm, causing grievous bodily injuries and manslaughter.

But it was a recent incident that is a lot more serious. After closing my locker door, I turned, ready to head for the showers, and my hand kind of lightly slapped the outer (this is important, I emphasize the word: outer as opposed to inner) thigh of a naked guy besides me.

He stared at me.

I averted my eyes and muttered some apologies. At this point, it is inconvenient to look him in the eyes or for that matter, any other parts of his body when I apologize. I hurriedly headed for the showers and the incident ended there.

On retrospect, it is more dangerous to hit a guy's butt rather than their girlfriend's butt.

If you slap their girlfriend's butt, you are giving the guy a chance, a real life opportunity and avenue to exhibit his long repressed machismo; without which the only other opportunity in which he can impress his girl might be during the weekly Counter-Strike sessions with his mates which he had begged them to lose.

With such considerations in mind, he will probably secretly harbour gratitude, thus be more likely to be lenient in his encounter with you. It will be probably be a case of stern (of all the sternness he can muster, at this point, for personal safety, it is imperative not to smile or laugh) warning, or in extreme cases, a few punches and kicks. The blows will likely be pulled and damage be further reduced if you can put up Oscar winning performances of pains, grimaces, complete with realistic, stereo groans and moans. (Note: additional points will be awarded to those who can spit blood on demand)

But if you (assuming you are a guy) hit a guy on his naked butt, it would be a totally different scenario. It will be personal. It will be rough. It will be seen as a direct blow to their ego. (Note: I am not implying in any way that the ego resides in the gluteus maximus. Such a statement would cause Freud to leap from his grave; an event I am not too keen to initiate. The world had enough of him as it is)

It will result in severe repercussions.

Since the slap on the butt is considered a direct attack on his manhood, even though the manhood in front of the butt itself, it will not be taken likely. Be sure that pain and suffering will follow.

Results are not likely to differ even if the other guy smiles and winks at you.

 
The perfect christmas gift for every car owner would be 04 wheel clamps.

In the case of an emergency, these drivers can then park their cars where and when they desire.

I would love to see someone clamp a wheel clamp.

 
There was a post in which I said that life without growth is death; stagnated existence without growth is not worth continuing. For the past few days, I have been wondering from where I derived that conclusion.

It is probably, on hindsight, a statement made out of my disappointment with the people around me. I choose my company carefully, for there were too many people that vexed me tremendously.

I know people who professed to be poor and thrifty, yet change two cars in two years. I know people who lies to everyone, including themselves. (And these people excludes the category of bosses, who are by definition, idiots)

I know primary school teachers who do not know the rough equivalent in centimetres, of an inch or a foot. And they are the ones who will shape the future of our nation.

I know christians who call themselves devout, yet know precious little about the bible. And these are the ones who are persuading me to attend church services. When I questioned them and pointed to so many instances where they have failed in duties of a christian, they resorted to their unjustified belief their omnipotent God will know that in their hearts they are devout and they will be saved, as if they can read (although some said that they can feel Him) God's mind. They obviously believe in salvation by grace, since they know precious little about salvation by deed and grace.

I told them that they will probably not be saved. And that kind of disturbed them a little. They called me prideful for putting me limited self in the place of God.

And I am arrogant.

I will judge whoever I wish to and I will judge God if it pleases me. He gave me free will and I will use it.

And I, in turn, welcome anyone to judge me.

But if they are saved, then God, in His infinite wisdom and patience, has a high tolerance for the sin of Sloth. And I might one day, finally humble myself before him.

That being said, I am still disappointed.

But I am questioning the place of growth in my life. It is now, of primary importance. I want to grow, and I am prompted to grow, in reaction to these people around me. I fear my own complacency.

I read, I write, I go to the gym, I take up classes, I am planning for my second degree, I challenge, I invite challenges just to grow. But am I doing these for love or for fear of mental, emotional and psychological death?

I live for love and passion.

But I fear, that as I grow stronger and faster, I distance myself from my loved ones. The day might come when the winds gather beneath my wings, and I need to unroot myself from the loving earth that nurtured me to fly the skies...

 
Someone jotted down the characteristics of what quality journalism is. It was quite an extensive list, but here are two which struck a chord in me:

Journalism does not seek to be objective but rather to make its inherent biases and perspectives clear so that readers can make choices on their own.

It seeks to find the widest useful context for the events that occur in our world each day. It attempts to explain those events within that context.

It is rare that a person who writes or speaks will list down his/her own inherent assumptions. Communication is seldom just a transmission of information, it is persuasion or manipulation. People with the gift of gab or the gift of language can be extremely influential.

It is power.

And with all powers, it takes a rare breed of men and women not to abuse them.

 
A few Saturdays back, I had a friendly argument with the cab driver on my way to SIM.

It seemed that revealing my schooling in philosophy is often an invitation to a discussion or a debate or an interview. People would be asking me about anything and everything and in most cases, I do welcome a dialogue.

But one question I have always found difficult to answer was what I can do with my degree. It is most irritating to admit that philosophers are in a way, irrelevant to the economy and the profit margin.

We spoke extensively about the economy that day. A natural choice since there is almost no escaping the recession. It is a worldwide phenomenon which has devoured everyone and almost everything.

My point was that the present economic model cannot be sustained. I am watching and waiting, for the birth of a new idea; an idea that will bring about a change in the mode of production; an idea that will signify the birth of a new economic model; an idea that will transfer the power from MNCs back to the nations and the states; an idea that will reduce the gross inequality that separates the rich from the poor.

"(ideas) are more powerful than is commonly understood. Indeed, the world is ruled by little else. Madmen in authority, who hear voices in the air, are distilling their frenzy from some academics scribblers of a few years back... Sooner or later it is ideas, not vested interests, which are dangerous for good or evil."
John Maynard Keynes
General Theory of Employment, Interest and Money

And although the cab driver disagreed, in a sense, he too, was waiting for an idea, for an idea that will change the individuals; for an idea that will inspire in individuals the care, the concern and the responsibility for fellow human beings. Change, he firmly believes will have to come from within; from individuals.

"It would be a lovely idea!"
- Mahatma Gandhi on democracy

He believes that individuals make up the society; thus they are both the problem and the solution. To him, the human condition is the true root of the suffering and the system, a mere inconvenience.

And it might be true. If individuals can truly and intimately grasp the nature of interdependency of their existence, then maybe we might be inclined to be more generous towards the faults, the flaws and the weaknesses of others.

To understand how we are all connected through a long chain of events, simply look at the implications of globalization. Globalization is a phenomenon that has been glamourized and sensationalized, so much so that we generally forget that there are people paying the price for our affluence.

Understood properly, globalization means that if someone in India dies of hunger and poverty, we all have blood on our hands.

Personally, I have my doubts on the efficiency of improving the whole through the changing individuals. Just as social workers or the MCDS can do little to affect the economic decisions or the distribution of resources of the state, social cohesiveness is of little consequence against the all pervasive force of the MNCs. They can slightly alleviate the pain and pressure but can really do little more.

In any case, not all are ready to be responsible to others. John Nash, was one of the few who were close to taking up the responsibility. He had in the heights of his schizophrenia, reportedly seeked to renounce his American citizenship, to be a citizen of the world.

Also note that companies are considered persons from the legal perspectives; complete with rights; responsibilities and entitlement. It is remarkable how similar a company is treated to a real person. It can sue; can be sued, be made liable or responsible for damages and it can speak of its own interests and its own survival almost as if it is alive and thinking.

Traditionally, the idea of survival is used on human beings and animals. And from my understanding, it never popularly used till the world wars to justify the engagement and the killing.

Now, it is used by companies to justify the exploitation of others.

Our conversation came to an end when we reached our destination. I paid him for his services and he gave me a discount for the conversation.

That day, two perspectives met on a journey.

That day, two persons met on a cab.

Both were waiting for the birth of an idea.

 
The wonders of mass messaging cannot be explained.

I dropped Glenn a SMS asking him what the doc said during Friday's check up: Just wondering what did your doc say?

As things went, my thumb was on steriods and it went too fast sending the message to the entire basketball mailing list. And I receive the following replies (please pardon their atrocious spelling) in chronological order -

Ah Tiong: I din go back yet prolly later tis week...

Bruce: Havent seen yet

Junbin: Huh? Wat u talking?

Mingji: my doc? wat doc?

Kelwin: I have a jones fracture. On my fifth metalasaral what's up?

Zihao: My doc? Did you sms the wrong person?

Weiyi: Wrong msg? "Just wondering what did your doc say?"

Looking at the injury list, I wonder if I should put a temporary stop to the weekly basketball sessions, after all, I am personally nursing my injured knee and my torn lips; the latter caused by two of Zihao's short range passes to my face.

But I figured that it would be easier to incapacitate Zihao than to stop our games.

Someone please remind me to bring a chopper this Sunday.

 
It has been quite some time since I last woke up, at least for the weekdays, eager to meet the morning sun or excited about the possibilities and the opportunities that each day might bring.

Something important has been lost. And although I cannot put a word to it at the moment, I intend to get it back.